About Me

I’m a graphic designer in south Texas. I have a lot to say. Some of it is offensive, some of it is funny, some of it makes you want to delete the internet… and most of it is grammatically correct. All of it is worthless. There will be cussing. My advice is unsound and following it may be ill-advised. I am bossy and pushy and opinionated… but in a cute way (right, you guys?).

I enjoy eating… a lot. I like driving fast and eating frozen yogurt and baking cookies but eating half the batter before it reaches its final cookie form. I draw. I sew. I scuba dive. I binge watch old tv shows on Netflix. I become insanely interested in hobbies for months at a time, then forget about them for half a year. I just remembered that I have some fudge in the refrigerator.

Kona and Nani are my dogs. Lily is my cat, who doesn’t get along with anyone except me. It’s a zoo, and everything I wear has animal hair on it, and I have probably ingested enough animal hair to make a sweater. That’s right—get in line, gents.

If you would like to contact me, you can send a note to breannesp at gmail dot com. Don’t spam me, bro.


*This is what I feel is some sort of necessary disclaimer telling you to not to steal my shit, and that is me presupposing that you think my shit is worth stealing. Anyway, please don’t, ok?