Soon, I’ll be heading north to Austin to participate in the frothy music-orgy that is SXSW. I’ve been mentally preparing myself to face the hordes of hipsters — more than the usual that I face during my trips to Austin. In addition to the dealing with my personal terror of going to all the same places as thousands upon thousands of people, I will most likely also be denied the consolation of my favorite Austin grub, as my usual favorite Austin restaurants are sure to be packed. Boo.

I’m sure I’ll have a good time, though — I wouldn’t be going otherwise. I do have a few concerns, though:

1. I’m not going to look cool enough. Ok, ok – I never look cool enough for anything. I barely look cool enough for work each day at the box factory. However, it’ll be way more obvious this weekend. Hopefully I don’t get called out. YEAH, THESE SANDALS ARE FROM TARGET, SO WHAT. THEY’RE COST EFFECTIVE. Ugh.

2. All things concerning my cell phone. I’ll be tweeting and snapping pictures like a maniac, I’m sure. I’ll need as much battery life as I can get… which is why I’ll be carrying two Enercell battery backups, which are worth nearly a full phone charge each. Doesn’t matter. Still stressed. In addition to just plain old battery fretting, the load on the cell towers is going to be HUGE. Hopefully the trusty Sprint tower can handle the load. Otherwise HOW WILL I CONVEY MY THOUGHTS TO THE ENTIRE INTERNET!?

3. OMG I KNOW I’M FORGETTING SOMETHING. There’s always something I forget. I’m a compulsive double-triple-quadruple-checker for things like my ID, debit card, and anything else I just might need, so until I’m actually where I need to be for the day, things will be unpleasant for me, as I’ll be making sure *something* is in my bag at least 5 times an hour.

this sucks4. I’ll end up somewhere shitty. As far as my plans go now, I feel like I have a few pretty good days planned out. However, I’m a chronic over-planner and without knowing specifics — exactly how many people will be at each event, how long the line will be, how difficult it’ll be to get in, where I’ll find food if I’m starving (note to self, stuff purse with Clif bars) — I am going to be a clenched up mess. I guess that’s where day drinking comes in… of which I fully plan to take advantage.

5. I’ll just miss the music shows I really wanted to see because of stupid traffic or hipster doofuses ruining things. My planning ahead and propensity for scheduling does nothing if the entire city is jammed up watching a guy ride a bike with a cat on his shoulders or something.

Ultimately, I can kill most of any of those sorrows with ice cream (I’m coming for you, Amy’s), some sort of cheese-based meal, or alcohol. I shouldn’t be worried or stressed, because this is going to be fun.

I will have fun, if it’s the last freakin’ thing I do.